The sweltering desert sun bakes a tall outcropping of rocks and scrub in Southern California at the height of summer.

ALEX (a man in his 20’s, stylish, fit, well groomed) comes up amongst the rocks first with ease. SKY (20’s, female, long hair, witchy, probably smells like patchouli) follows him close behind. They pause and take a drink from a bottle of water, calmly taking in the beauty.

A couple moments later, we hear gasping, cursing at the rocks, and generally moaning. KELCI finally appears in a sweaty lump that collapses on the rock. She’s in her late 20’s, dust caked lululemon leggings and sweat stains under her sports bra that’s barely holding together her broken heart.

Jesus Sky, if you brought me all the way out here to murder me you could have at least warned me about the hike first.

Honey I will be the first one to kill you. Sky here wouldn’t even hurt Charles Manson.

He’s just misunderstood.

See?

How much longer? I wanna get into this spring you two wouldn't shut up about.

Sky hands her the water bottle and Kelci guzzles it.

Time is a social construct.

Sky you know what I mean.

Alex refers to his compass and clocks where the sun is located.

About another hour.

Kelci groans.

But hey you're killing it!

How are you guys just fine?! It’s been seven miles. I’m dying.

I do hot yoga sculpt three days a week. This is nothing.

Why did we have to come out all this way? I said we could just hang out at my place.

Because it’s been two months and you haven’t left your apartment.

This is the real reason why Todd dumped me. I'm lazy and fat.

See! That! No talking about my friend like that. You are going to leave all of the Todd bullshit in the hot spring. It's time to release.

Yea bitch.

Alex takes a banana hand out of his bag.

You brought a whole hand of bananas?

Alex snaps off a banana and digs into it.

Girl I don’t wanna cramp. Do you?

He offers a banana to the two of them and they wave it off.

Well, next we have to cross the river. The waters are really cold, so be ready.

We have to forge a fucking river? What is this, Oregon Trail?

Organ trail? Like. A bloody trail of organs? Gross.

Kelci rolls her eyes.

What’s with this attitude you've been dragging around all day?

Kelci sighs and softens.

Sorry. I’m a little bitchy with the heat. I feel like I’m a total mess and totally unprepared.

Sky pats her back.

And sometimes releasing things brings up inner turmoil.

SKY hugs KELCI, but boy she's sweaty. Kelci winces at the grossness. Alex just pats Kelci on the head.

I'll hug you after you shower.

A wide stream cuts across a gulch, moving steadily with rocks and deep pockets here and there.

The three of them sit at one side of it, taking off their shoes.

It’s a good thing we got here so early. The river is too dangerous to cross at night.

These stupid hot springs better be worth it.

She looks down at her bare feet, having just stripped off her socks.

Oh god. My feet are blistering and swollen.

Still not as swollen as your ex.

Oh. that’s true he’s put on a lot of weight.

And not in a cute way.

Kelci laughs with schadenfreude until her foot touches the river.

HOLY-- That’s cold! Nope. Let’s go around.

Nope. There’s no other way.

Kelci turns to the group.

I thought you were my friends.

It's the price your soul pays to experience the hot spring.

After a while they all start to wade into the river with their belongings over their heads.

Oof. Yeah this is angrier than I remember it. The forest is upset about something.

Kelci and Alex look at each other, then at her.

Are you. Did you already take the shrooms?

When we lost cell service I saw a crow and he told me to take them. I couldn’t say no.

Oh my god she’s tripping.

Suddenly Alex begins to slip! He catches himself, barely, but his BANANAS float off.

My bananas!

The river accepts your offering--

Oh my god. I cannot right now.

Kelci slips in the river! As Alex helps her back to her feet, Sky becomes distracted by a dark figure amongst the trees along with a echoing sound of "TAP TAP TAP”...

Kelci is soaked.

UGH! This sucks! I never should have come here.

Sky snaps out of it and looks back where she saw the figure, there’s nothing there.

The golden sun shines its last rays through the pines, casting long shadows as we arrive at a clearing. The kind of place that’s not _officially_ on a map, but is well tread by campers.

Kelci, sweaty and exhausted, immediately takes off her pack and plops herself onto a log around the fire pit as Alex and Sky start unfurling a tarp and tent roll.

Thank god.

The melody of the pines have sent us here, our destined spot. Perfect.

How do you know?

Because the trees are smiling at us.

TAP TAP TAP echoes through the trees.

Sounds like we have neighbors.

We can go meet them later. You two set up the tent I'm going to collect firewood while there's still light.

But the hot spring!

Don't worry, we'll go tonight.

Kelci stands in the middle of the tent, bikini underneath a half worn white mesh cover up. She reads a love letter that Todd once wrote to her, again. She looks at the photo of them attached.

CLOSE ON: The letter full of poetic love. We pause on a section that says "I can't wait till I get to marry you."

She starts to cry, folds the letter and put it into her shirt. Rolls her eyes at herself.

Suddenly a breeze picks up. The tent shakes a little. A silhouette of a dark figure appears at the door.

Hello?

No Answer. Kelci slowly opens the tent. Nothing. Then out of nowhere the other side of the tent is UNZIPPED quickly. Kelci SHRIEKS!

As she sees another woman (RACHEL, looks an awful lot like Kelci) who has a rock raised in her hand.

Oh my god I’m so sorry. I thought you were him.

Kelci, uh. You might wanna come out here.

Kelci throws her coverup completely on and comes out of the tent.

Alex and Sky are standing by the fire pit, fire illuminating them and two other figures. OATS (Looks a lot like Sky) and HALL (Alex look alike)

-- and the tapping sounds! Just wouldn’t stop

We’re getting out of here

Rachel re-appears from the other side, she’s walked around the tent.

I think it’s a ghost or something. He just appeared at our camp site. Hooded.

Dark.

Towering.

I mean there are plenty of us here now. I don't think he’d bother us.

It doesn’t matter. You should go home. We're leaving.

But we just got here. The springs!

Trust me it’s not worth your life.

Wait. Let me consult the spirits.

Sky pulls out her pendulum. Oats notices and pulls hers out too. They lock eyes and come closer together, like two Beyblade battlers.

Is it safe to stay?

The pendulum swings in the direction of "No"

Should we all stay?

The pendulum swings even bigger "NO!"

I don't know guys my pendulum is saying a hard no.

Mine is saying no too. BIG NO.

Sky and Oats look at each other in agreement.

Maybe we should leave. Wait. Spirits, if we _do_ stay, will it help Kelci?

The rock moves around.

Well that’s a yes at least. Hmmm.

Kelci kicks rocks at the rocks, she MELTS DOWN.

I'm not going just because your stupid fucking rocks "told us to!" They’re rocks! You’re on mushrooms!

Valid, but also I don’t feel like being chopped up like a sushi roll by Jason Vorhees.

No. NO! I'm so sick of this shit! I just hiked eight miles that I didn't want to hike for a spa day that’s not even a spa day so I could soak in a stupid hot spring for spiritual healing or whatever and I don't even know if I even want to heal! The only thing I DO know is that the hot spring sounds amazing and it's all I've had to look forward to all week. So no. I'm not leaving until I’m In. That. Spring.

Everyone is stunned. Silence.

Hall looks down and sees our trio’s only lantern leaning against the tent. In a flash he steals it and runs off towards the stream.

I'm sorry! You’re on your own!

Oats looks after Hall and just bolts for it. Kelci looks at Rachel.

What the fuck? That was our only lantern!

I’m sorry. It’s... I should go.

She trots off after them. Our OG trio is stunned, illuminated only by the weak campfire.

Well that was fucked up.

The campsite now has a stronger campfire going, providing the only light they have. Kelci and Alex are munching on graham crackers.

You're sure you don't want any?

Nah. I want to keep tripping. I'll be okay.

Sky is very fascinated by the log they’re sitting on.

You know what I could really go for right now?

What?

A banana.

Kelci rolls her eyes, turns to Sky.

Sky, how far are the springs from here?

Not far. But there’s something you have to do first.

SKY and Alex look at each other and pull out a bag of stuff. Intervention style.

Wait...

Yup.

Why did you bring that stuff here? I don't want to see it.

Exactly. It's time to let it go.

Time to let HIM go.

Do we have to do this now?

Kelc, clearly he wasn't the right fit for you-

I know. I just still don't get it? He was so in love with me and we were planning our future together and looking at apartments and naming our future kids. And then all of a sudden it’s over.

Honestly, I think he panicked.

What is it about me that makes guys panic? I think I'm just meant to be a "good time girl" because all these guys love dating me, until it's time to commit.

Kelci. You are a goddess. And if only you could see the crown of stars around your head you would never be sad over a man child ever again.

Even though I didn't take any shrooms I agree.

Let him go. Find someone who deserves you.

I don't want to.

You can’t heal until you release.

Kelci looks at the bag of Todd's stuff.

And we don’t mean metaphorically honey you’ve been hoarding all this junk at our apartments. It’s either this or we charge you rent.

I was ready to let it go for good I just-

Great. Say goodbye.

Alex takes out items one at a time, first a hoodie.

This was his favorite-

Sky pulls out a necklace with a large, heavy pendant.

No! He gave that to me. I can wear it again eventually-

Alex pulls out a watch.

That I should actually find a way to give back.

As this happens we see a dark figure moving towards them. Tall, hooded, towering. Dementor type energy. We don't see his face. This is MACHETE MAN. Our heroes fall silent.

Got a light?

Uncomfortable, Alex quickly hands him the lighter. The friends try to not make eye contact with him.

Keep it man. Have a good night.

MACHETE MAN turns on the lighter, but we still don't see his face. he turns away and walks off.

Is it the shrooms or-

Nope. Let's get inside the tent.

But- I thought the hot spring-

You seriously want to walk around in the woods with no lanterns at midnight with that guy wandering around?

We can take a log from the fire.

Alex gives her the look.

Fine. But I refuse to take this bathing suit off until I’m in that damn spring.

Kelci, Sky, and Alex are sleeping in the tent. Kelci is sleeping in her swim suit and Todd's hoodie, hugging the bag of Todd's belongings for warmth.

Tap Tap Tap. Kelci looks around. Nudges Alex. Who groans at her.

(whispering)

You hear that?

(whispering)

No. Go back to sleep.

(whispering)

I can hear it.

Suddenly a SLASH is carved into their tent. They all SCREAM. Machete Man steps through the hole in the tent. The figure let’s out a GUTTERAL HOWL like a DRUNKEN ANGRY WOLF

The trio escape out the back of the tent and run, barefoot into the woods, wearing nothing but their pajamas/bathing suit. Kelci leave's Todd's bag behind.

They pause near a tree and catch their breath. All whispering, tensely.

Tell me I did not just trip out. That’s real?

Yea. Holy fuck

What do we do? Run for the river?

We’d get hypothermia.

Grab a branch and go fight him? Our phones are in the tent and... Are you wearing Todd’s Hoodie?

I was cold.

And the necklace and watch?

Oh I forgot them!

Kelci moves to run back toward the tent when SUDDENLY A FIREBALL blasts into the sky where the tent is.

What the fuck!

He burnt up all Todd's stuff!

(completely serious)

A fire cleanse.

Alex looks around. Spots a dim light in the distance.

Look! There’s a light that way. Maybe there’s someone who can help us.

They run off towards it.

They are running towards the light, almost there. Suddenly Alex cramps up!

Fuck! Cramp! Cramp got me!

Quick in here!

Sky and Kelci throw Alex’s arms over their shoulders and they hobble quickly to the cave.

There’s a familiar looking lantern with a bloody handprint on it at the top of the entrance to what looks like an abandoned mine shaft.

They all pause before rushing in.

Wait. Is- is that?

Our lantern.

How? This can’t be for real.

Tap. Tap. Tap. It’s getting louder. Closer.

That fucking guy is getting closer! I don’t care. Just in. IN!

The inside of the cave. Clearly someone has been living here. There’s a small fire crackling inside with a kettle on top of it, long dry. The trio scatters into the cave, taking it in.

Jesus the feng shui...

Someone’s been living here.

A slow burbling sound coming from one side of the cave, tucked behind some rocks.

Uh, guys?

Sky has found there’s a hot spring inside the cave! The three dirty sweaty friends gather around in wonderment.

Finally.

She gingerly puts a toe in.

Oh man. It’s perfect! It’s just like a hot tub!

It must be connected to the other spring system.

As Kelci starts to take the hoodie off to get in-

Are you crazy? We have to get out of here.

But- but it's right here! Only for a second. It will probably help your leg too.

Alex considers this. SKY pulls out her pendulum. It swings.

No. He's coming.

I'm not listening to the-

I'm telling you! We have to leave now.

The pendulum swings.

Nevermind we don't have time. Hide.

They look at her as she crawls behind an outcropping of junk.

(whispered)

HIDE.

The friends hide amongst the collected "treasures" of Machete Man.

Machete man stands at the entrance of the cave. He puts his hand on the wall of the entrance.

The vermin are gone.

He cackles, tossing a bag onto a pile of his things. Todd’s watch and necklace spill out onto the dusty floor.

The machete man throws back his hoodie to reveal a disheveled and scarred face. He snatches up a bottle of pure everclear from a pile and slugs it, slumping down by his fire.

Sky silently points to the entrance of the cave and the friends start sneaking towards the entrance. It's looking hopeful.

Sky helps the hobbled Alex sneak past all of Machete Man's stuff. Kelci is almost there when--

CRUNCH.

She has stepped on Todd's watch. She looks down sheepishly.

Machete man looks up and sees their reflections in the kettle.

God Damn RATS.

He stands up and turns to them, pulling out his MACHETE!

YOU VERMIN. GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY VALLEY!!!

He roars and charges at them! Kelci tries to run but he grabs her by Todd's hoodie!

Alex swings his one working leg and knocks Kelci to the ground while holding the sweatshirt and the SLASH only destroys the hoodie. Kelci wriggles out of the remaining fabric and his grasp, wearing nothing but her bathing suit.

Machete Man snarls and thrusts his blade into Alex's shoulder, SLICING him open with slicked crimson. Alex SCREAMS in pain as Machete Man cackles.

SKY throws her pendulum at Machete Man, drawing his ire. He leans down and grabs Todd's necklace; lumbering over toward SKY, he cinches it around her neck, choking her.

No! Sky!

ALEX musters his strength and SLAMS into machete man with his injured shoulder knocking all of them against the cave wall and to the ground.

Alex and Sky help each other up.

Alex, your shoulder!

Behind you!

Machete man grabs Sky's long hair from behind and goes to slash her throat, but just in time Kelci JUMPS onto his back. He flails trying to get her off. Alex pulls Sky away and Machete Man SLASHES through her hair, taking most of it with him.

Kelci and Machete man struggle, and he drunkenly stumbles backward through the cave, THROWING Kelci off him and into the hot spring!

He shakes it off and cackles to himself.

WET RATS.

He kneels down at the edge of the spring and forces her head down, drowning her.

We focus on Kelci, under water, fighting for her life. She SCREAMS! Air bubbling out of her mouth. The noise of the cave around her starts to fade and dim and Todd's letter floats out of her bathing suit top where she had stashed it.

It floats in front of her, taunting her. Kelci brushes it away and starts fighting back.

Back above the water, Sky SMASHES Machete Man's head with the kettle with a sickening crack. Machete Man falls unconscious, releasing Kelci who surfaces GASPING for air.

Stillness. The friends looks at each other with relief.

Are you okay?

Yeah. You?

I've had rougher nights.

Kelci swims away from Machete man, to the other side of the small spring. His machete bobs up and floats over to her.

Kelci picks up the machete looking it over.

Well, we've got an interesting souvenir.

The friends all laugh.

Jesus What a night.

You thought it was just a rock. Come on, you should know never to disrespect the pendu--

Machete Man ROARS TO LIFE and lunges for Kelci. Everyone SCREAMS! Instinctually Kelci lifts up the machete and Machete Man lunges himself right onto the machete like meat on a skewer. He is stunned, life fading from his eyes as he falls over for good face first into the hot spring just in front of Kelci.

Sky and Alex look at Kelci.

The three friends sit in the hot tub, battered, bruised, bloodied. Kelci is finally content.

Wow you guys were right. I feel so much better. I really needed this.

We pull back and Machete Man is floating in the tub with them, with drinks on his back.